I miss the old days.
Remember when life was so easy with only 3 TV channels and no internet?
My oven went out before Thanksgiving, so I had to buy a new one. It's a new world, folks. This dual oven has a tiny screen to control everything, and it is hard to manage. I realized after Thanksgiving that it is meant to be connected to your phone and operated that way. I did it, and it's much easier to operate and pretty cool.
Everything was fine until my phone did an update and kicked my oven off. Now I am trying to reconnect. I had to set up a password for my oven, and for the first month, I had it stuck to the outside. The password had to be very difficult with special characters. When I realized I didn't need it, I tossed it. Now I cannot reconnect. It doesn't give you the option of a new password. It's an oven, not a bank safe with lots of money.
Do they think someone will take over my oven to cook their turkey? In any case, I am back to using this small screen.
I miss the old days, with knobs.
Dec 8 - 14
Tell me, when you walk your dogs, do you have conversations with them? At first, we would have lengthy discussions about them doing their business, but as time moved on, our conversations have become much more in-depth. Lately, we have been having conversations about which animal shelter we should contribute to. Surprisingly, the dogs are on different sides of the aisle. Cooper would donate all his food to help other dogs, whereas Phoebe wants all the food for herself. Cooper is worried about the economy and feels we need to help our fellow pooches out. Phoebe, on the other hand, wants us to build a large ballroom so she can associate with more elite dogs. I guess she saw a neighbor's dog's estate and got jealous. I now will have to sit down with the two of them and explain how we first help our fellow companions before we try to impress the very few. And I think from now on I will just start wearing earbuds and listen to music on our future walks.
Dec 1 - 7
I want to thank Saint Philomene's for inviting me back to make the gravy for their big dinner. You know I have been kicked out of there twice.
Once, back in 1967, my hair was too long and the principal literally threw me out of school.
Then, a few years back, I was helping with the gravy for Thanksgiving, and I was dismissed again.
Now I heard through a rumor that it was because I was flirting with a nun. Now that was not true; we were just having a conversation. I don't remember what about.
Nov 24 - 30
Ok folks, I have a deal for you.
I am looking for a buyer for my Ford Mach-E. This is an electric Mustang and after 3 and a half years, it still has a 290-mile range. This car is special. It is fast and you can charge it right at home.
One of the benefits of this amazing car is the aroma inside. You see, I was transporting 20 gallons of Coca-Cola products and 5 gallons of root beer syrup spilled into the trunk. It soon spread throughout the entire car. So, you can imagine the wonderful aroma when driving this car.
The stickiness comes in handy when you are trying to eliminate fruit flies. I sometimes park the car near my kitchen to attract those little suckers. If you purchase this car today, I will throw in a 3-gallon tub of vanilla ice cream so you can have a root beer float. What do you say about that?
Your kids will love it.