OK, I had nothing to write tonight so I went back over 10 years and found this story I wrote when the kids were still darlings. I wish I could say that now.
We appear to have a dilemma at our house. It seems that Hermie, my youngest daughter's pet, got out of his enclosure and is loose in the house. My youngest of course is very distraught. My older daughter is afraid Hermie will crawl into her bed so she does not think she can sleep until Hermie is captured. My wife is afraid she will step on him in the middle of the night.
I have looked everywhere a five inch green caterpillar could be hiding, but to no avail. We have tried to train the dog to sniff Hermie out, but she has just found the snacks the darling children have hidden around the house. I just cannot imagine why any creature would want to escape our wonderful home.
Jan 22 - 28
Has anyone used Babbel? It is a language app that will teach you any language. Let me explain. So besides Cooper we have a 16 year old dog that has very advanced dementia. Consequently, she doesn’t know where she should do her business, and so she does that business anywhere she is at the time she has the urge. Ok, fine, but now Cooper thinks he can also do his business inside. The other night I took him out a 7PM and he just sat there and looked at me for 3 minutes. I gave up and then took him out at 9PM. Again, he just sat there and stared at me, and after 5 minutes I let him in. When we went to bed I put him in his cage and then let him out at 5AM. Again, he just sat there and stared at me, as if to say. “Hey everyone else gets to go inside why are you making me go outside?”. So I thought if I could learn the language of Dog, then I could explain it to him. What do you think?
I wanted to give you an update on our missing friend, she is home safe.
She was found shortly after we sent out our original email but we still do not know the full details regarding the cause of the disappearance. Sorry of leave our devoted readers in the dark, it was a whirlwind of emotions.
Jan 15 - 21
Have you ever come to a situation where you knew if you proceeded to find an answer to an unfavorable situation, you knew you would be very sorry?
So, when we bought our house in the foothills 14 years ago, the downstairs bathroom came with this free standing shower that resembles something out of Star Trek. It is honestly so complicated that we haven’t used it in 12 years. Anyway, I was walking by when I saw this unusual object on the top that coincidentally matched the white color of the shower. I reach up and grab this thing and as I turn it I see on the other side of this object, it is a empty sour cream container. OK, I was thinking, I hadn’t bought sour cream in a very long time. So knowing that, why did I proceed to open it?
Jan 8 - 14
Addiction is a terrible consequence of imbibing in something you shouldn’t.
Special needs kids are not easy to raise and to remedy some crazy situations my wife and I should drink alcohol, but instead she makes cookies. We don’t need family therapy because we have cookies. When we have a difficult situation we eat more cookies. When there is a total meltdown because something didn’t arrive in time from Amazon, we eat even more cookies. It doesn’t help that it is cold outside and it gets dark early, but warm cookies seem to correct all the world’s troubles. However soon, we need to figure out a way stop this addictive behavior. My suggestion is we drink more, but my wife is a responsible adult. I used to admire her for that quality, but now, I am unsure. Anyway, we soon have to transition away from delicious, mouthwatering, warm, freshly made chocolate oatmeal cookies. I do remind my wife that chocolate is not good for dogs, so she makes plain oatmeal cookies for Cooper, but I eat most of those as well.
Please don’t tell Cooper or my wife.